Confidence. I briefly mentioned this in my last post regarding my 30-day adventure.
Something magical happens when I step on my yoga mat. I’m transported to a different world, where all that matters is my breath. For one hour of my day, there are no peer pressures, outside influences or society telling me how and why I should do something. It’s just me, my breath and my movements. I am capable of anything. And let me tell you, that’s when I feel most confident.
There, I can fly. I can bend, move, flow and create. If I can’t, I at least try. And when I fall, I try again. No one is watching, judging, or looking at me with critical eyes. It’s just me, my mat and my breath. Why then, do I lose this feeling when I step off my mat?
I’ve pondered this question a lot lately. What does confidence mean to me and how do I cultivate it in other areas of my life.
For me, it boils down to past struggles with perfectionism, feeling judged and my fear of failure. You’ve probably heard me talk about these things before. I don’t like to be judged. If I can’t do something or do it well, what will others think of me? For some reason, others’ opinions of me seem to matter more than my opinion of myself.
Here’s what I’ve realized – I’m simply projecting my own insecurities onto others. NO ONE likes to be judged! Yet, I’ve certainly judged those who can’t do the very thing I’m trying to accomplish. I’ve seen others fail or make fools of themselves and formulated my opinions about their worth based on that single interaction. Was that right of me? Absolutely not.
What I do know is this: My worth is not determined by what others think of me. My worth as a person is not determined by any certain skillset I may possess. My worth stems from my own opinions of myself!
As I’ve become more comfortable in my own skin, I’ve also become more comfortable with others’ opinions of me, Strangely enough, this has helped to build my confidence more than anything. If others don’t like what I have to offer, they aren’t wrong or terrible people for not recognizing my pure awesomeness. They just aren’t my people. Or this isn’t our time. But by holding back part of who I am and what I’m passionate about, I deprive you, my sweet readers, and the rest of the world from whatever it is I have to offer.
And I want to find you – my tribe, my people. Those whose hearts beat with the same vibrations as mine. When I face a scenario where I may be apprehensive, I remind myself to “own it” – to face it head on and unabashedly show the world who I am. That’s the only way my tribe can find me, and I can find them.
Putting myself out there and “owning” the situation, skill set or knowledge can be scary. It certainly isn’t easy. All those feelings of shame and embarrassment try to creep up. But when they do, I simply give myself a pep talk and remind myself that only I have the power to determine my worth. As I’ve said before, you only grow and expand your horizons when you step outside the edge of your comfort zone.
So now I want to hear from you! What does confidence mean to you? Where do you feel most confident? And how do you cultivate that confidence in all areas of your life?